Progress Report (one month into Operation Sex Appeal)

How does it feel?
If I had to pick a thesis Operation Sex Appeal it would be the question I posed in my first blog entry: Can happiness, fulfillment, and purpose be skin deep? I’ve noticed that a few people are concerned that I’m embarking on this journey because I don’t feel attractive, that is not the case. I feel very comfortable in my skin, actually I think I’m pretty hot. I like my curves and hopefully I don’t sound like a complete narcissist, but I think I have the best breasts in the whole wide world.
That being said, I’ve felt happier since I started this experiment than I’ve felt in a long time. Now there could be many factors to this, I’m a full time student again, I have wonderful, loving friends and family, and for the first time in a long time I’ve re-gained some financial stability that means I don’t have to decide between paying rent and eating. Seeing the numbers go down on the scale is very nice, but I think that the real a happiness I’m experiencing so far is due to having a project that I can focus on and that is a creative outlet. Who knows though? Maybe in a few more weeks when people start to ask if I’ve lost weight or if people start offering to buy me drinks, I’ll change my mind and decide that is where true happiness lies.
On to progress that can be measured in numbers!
I have discovered my measurements; they are bust 38, waist 31, hips 40. If you recall the average of the top ten sexiest women were 34-24-34. A 24 inch waist seems very small to me. If you disagree check out Supersize vs Super Skinny(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CEtRGQWObmY). The super skinny girls (who border anorexia more often than not) usually have waists that range from 20-24 inches. As I’ve previously mentioned, I am not willing to do anything to risk my health to achieve my goals. I’m pretty sure that 24 inches at my height would require me to stop eating, or cut out part of my midsection with a very large knife... neither of which is a healthy option.
Instead, I think that I will use a more reasonable goal of trying to achieve the golden ratio. The bust and hips should be about the same measurement with the waist being 30% smaller. So if I set 38 as the goal for bust and hips, then my waist should be 26.6 inches. I think that my late teens (when I was training for my black belt a working out an average of 3 hours a day, 6 days a week) my waist was maybe 27 inches. Currently I am doing light exercise an average of 30 minutes every day. Looks like I may need to do less reading for Victorian Literature and more hard core exercise.
DIET:
I think the diet has been going reasonably well for someone who really loves food. I have only gone over 1500 calories twice, not wait, three times in the past two weeks. That’s not bad. Once it was because I just really wanted something deep fried. I had potato skins, they were possibly the best thing I have ever tasted. Also, it is my birthday on the 5th.I have 3 dinners planned. It’s my birthdays so I’m going to eat whatever I want, deal with it.


EXERCISE:
So I’m only working out an average of 30 minutes a day. This past week I’ve been trying to do a work out video that is marketed towards women on top of walking back and forth to the train and using stairs instead of elevators or escalators. I am full of excuses when it comes to reason for not exercising. Some are valid like I am working and going to school all the time which makes me tired all the time. Some are not so valid like it’s raining (this is particularly not valid when you work out inside).
I really enjoy yoga. I highly recommend it to anyone and everyone. I find that it when done first thing in the morning it works better than coffee to wake you up. It also increases your flexibility and decreases stress. Or at least it does for me. I also highly recommend belly dance to all women of any age and any size. It makes you appreciate your body and love your curves. I’ve been belly dancing since I was 18 and I love it. That being said, neither exercise burns many calories. Seriously, you burn more calories masturbating for 10 minutes than you do for 10 minutes of yoga or belly dance. But they can be complimentary to other forms of exercise.
I’ve been trying different videos, websites, books in search of an exercise that works for me. This site (http://www.bodyrock.tv/) is pretty excellent but really difficult. I do the workout as fast as I can which is ridiculously slow by comparison but I still definitely feel it (thanks Dave by the way). As far as aerobics go, if you can get past the stupid hosts with their candy coloured outfits and Botox faces, Yoga Booty Ballet will get your heart racing. But you have to look like an idiot for 30-45 minutes while you do the work out. So as of yet, I have not found the ideal work out for me. But I’ll keep you posted on what I like and don’t like.
PROGRESS:
So I’m weighing myself once a week and taking my measurements once a month. My current weight is 165 lbs. which means I’ve 5 lbs. I’m told that it is healthy to lose 2 pounds per week. As I started a little over 2 weeks ago, I’m in a healthy range. I still get super impatient and want instant satisfaction with minimal effort, though. I spend all this time recording what I eat, making food, reading labels and only 5 pounds come off. I’m proud of myself for making progress but at the same time, I cannot help but wonder if my time could be better spent. I re-took my starting out body picture because I realised the tights I was wearing dose a good job of hiding the fat. So here’s a picture of me in my underwear (scandalous!):


So I went and got some instant gratification at the hair salon instead. I went to go see about hair extensions and apparently they are not cheap (if anyone wants to throw $500 at me I will go get the extensions). I got my hair cut, styled, and coloured as a compromise. Andi at Renaissance in Abbotsford did it and she did a super fabulous job, I highly recommend her. But judge for yourself with the before and after pictures:
Before


After




Instant gratification #2: I got high-heels, my first non-platform gothy looking pair in years and I love them.





Is my sex appeal increasing yet? Is it working? Let me know what you think... Next week, Confidence!
D

lip gloss

This has been a difficult blog for me to write. I’ve re-written it a few times. It is supposed to be about what the media presents as non-physical traits that are attractive in women to heterosexual men. Maybe that’s part of the issue, I had trouble formulating what I was even trying to make the blog about. The following list are other reasons things went south and I couldn’t just write it:
• Before my first posting I was pretty sure that the media presented men as traditionally male interests (like sports, beer, cars, and power tools). I was wrong. It took me by surprise because I had already started planning other blogs around this and now that’s out the window. Silly Devon for not researching first.
• I’ve had Britney Spears 3 suck in my head since for a week and a day.
• I’ve been dieting. And I’ve been in a really stressful week at school and I’m an emotional eater. So I haven’t been able to stuff my face with cookies to get rid of the stress of school. And then I feel guilty about wanting to stuff my face with cookies which makes me more stressed out. This is why I don’t normally diet.
• I haven’t had a day off (between work and school) since Christmas Day and I think I’m starting to burn out a little bit.
• My editor is out of town and basically unreachable due to shooting kids in the face (paintball).
• I feel sexiest writing what I’d like to write.
• I started to question how accurate my research is. I’m still an undergrad. I’m not backing up my work with credible sources. Most / all of what I have to say comes from the internet or what I have observed. People know not to take this too seriously right? But it is serious to me. Its helping me have shape to my life and keeping me from watching three seasons of LOST back to back to back.
• I can’t drink on anti-depressants and this week I really wanted a glass of wine.

So those are the reasons I couldn’t write my blog this week. Now that’s out of the way. It’s time to stop whining and fucking write it.
For the sake of this blog, let it be known that when I refer to men, I’m referring to men the way the media presents them, same goes for women and both of the heterosexual persuasion.
So I Goggled. And I found lists and lists and lists of what men found attractive about women. I watched commercials. I watched movies. I listened to pop music and non-pop music. The most astonishing thing I found was that women and men disagree about what men find attractive about women.
So ladies first. Women in forms of media that are directed towards women are often portrayed as being nice, neighbourly, sweet, big hearted, nurturing, and a little quirky. I think this is because (as far as I can tell) women get sold things by having the seller relate to them. The woman on TV says “I’m just like you, sweet heart. I am quiet and quirky. I wear jeans. I want X but I always lose out to that Vapid Slut with big boobs. Take my hand, we’ll make you over into a better you, you enhance. Then you’ll have X and you’ll be better that Vapid Slut because you’re sweet on the inside like me and you have real true beauty that Vapid will never have.” Of course, the enhancer is whatever they’re trying to sell. This is also a common sub-plot to any main stream romantic comedy. Yes guy meets girl and then something happens that they can’t be together and then they get together but the makeover is usually happening somewhere in the back ground.
The media tends to divide women into four main categories. One is the sweet and lovely girl next door, which as I just mention is what women think men want. The next is the buddy girl. She’s one of the boy’s. She plays football and watches sports, fixes your car, and drinks beer. This is what I thought men would like and in the real world, I think a lot of men do but in the land of media she is just another boy. The next is generic older woman. She is either a mom, or a MILF, or an angry neighbour, or an aunt with lip stick on her teeth. She’s there, that’s her only purpose. And then of course, there’s the woman women hate: The Vapid Slut with big boobs. This is the type of woman the media says men want.
I feel like a terrible person for saying it. Because I know that men aren’t like that and don’t like that or at least the men I hang around with but every Axe, beer, razor, and car commercial would disagree with me. Pop culture states men like Vapid Slut because men only care about sex and Vapid Slut is easy. That’s why nice girls hate her. And I’m focusing on what men want not what women think men should want.
Which brings me to the two most common things I found on the lists of sexiness. One is confidence (which makes sense, what good is a hot girl if she won’t make eye contact or talk to you), the other is the embodiment of SEX.
Confidence is fairly straight forward. Its listed as confidence. The embodiment of SEX though was a little more difficult to figure out. It came from the accumulation of many things and then it hit me that, yes some are yellow, some are blue, and some are red but they’re all M&Ms. Each list would have confidence listed and the then the rest of the list would be things like ‘the way she drunk dances with her girlfriends,’ ‘when she suggests watching a dirty movie,’ ‘panty lines,’ and my personal favourite ‘watching her put on lip gloss.’ [A side note, around May, Amanda Palmer did a twit pic compilation of her putting on makeup like a rock star. When it came to lip gloss, she said apply lip gloss for that “ready to blow” look. Anytime I put on lip gloss or see someone else put on lip gloss, I giggle. I think I may have to make a youtube video complete with a Britney Spears sound tract of me putting on lip gloss, preferably in slow motion]. All are indicators of girls who want to have sex so I just mashed them up into one neat category. Let’s face 15 million micro blogs saying:
Men like women who wear lip gloss. I bought lip gloss and put it on.
Won’t be as interesting as one or two longer blogs in which I can cover a lot of ground and tell hilarious antidotes... well hilarious to me at least.
So next Monday will be the first Monday of the month therefore I will be giving you an update on my weight lose progress and the frustrations that go along with dieting and trying to find the time to exercise. But the following Monday will be all about how to be confident and then the next two Mondays will be a two-parter all about SEX! Yay!
Looking forward to blogging about fucking and slutting it up.
Devon
http://twitter.com/littledevongirl

How do I make myself sexy?

How do I make myself sexy? By sexy what I mean is sexually appealing, hot, desirable. But here is where the problem lies, sexy is in the eye of the beholder. The man sitting to the left of me at the coffee house maybe attracted to that tall, slender, almost androgynous look that seems to monopolize the high fashion runways. The girl to the right of me may admire a curvaceous, voluptuous body with very traditionally feminine features. The guy by the window may not care what a woman looks like as long as she dresses like the Easter bunny every other Tuesday night. Not everyone is raised in the same environment so not everyone has the same tastes. I won’t even try to get into straight, gay, bi and gender issues. There is not enough blog space in the whole of the internet.

So maybe I should start with who I’d like to appeal to. As I have stated in my previous blog, I would like to try and conform to what the media’s perception of what sexy is. Although this is not true in every case, I think that it would be a safe assumption to say that the vast majority of sexy images of women are catering to what film, television, magazines, radio (yes even radio), and the internet would assume that heterosexual men would be attracted to. Even commercials, shows, movies, and music that are marketed to women still maintain the ‘sexy to heterosexual men’ image. Don’t agree; look at any Victoria Secret catalogue. Or pick up a copy of Cosmo. Or turn on your television, it’s there, I swear.

Well now I have an audience (sort of, its more the concept of an audience because it will always be what I think the majority of the media thinks is the viewer and what it is they like to view… ouch I think I just exploded my brain a little bit): heterosexual men. But that’s still pretty broad. What I’ve decided to do is use askmen.com’s list of the top 99 sexiest women of 2009, or at least the top ten of them. There’s many top sexiest people list all over the place but I chose askmen.com’s list because the initial batch is put forth by askmen.com but the women’s ranking is decided by the people who visit the site. I like this because it means that the content is decided by media and the audience. Cool, eh?
Anyways here’s the list (and a link www.askmen.com):
10. Kate Beckensale
9. Kristen Bell
8. Rihanna
7. Scarlette Johanssen
6. Alessandra Ambrosio
5. Anne Hathaway
4. Keeley Hazell
3. Marisa Miller
2. Megan Fox
1. Eva Mendes

Based on this list I have made a list to set parameters for specs for physical attraction:
• 9 have hair longer than their shoulders
• 6 are brunettes and 4 are blondes (in most of their pictures)
• the average weight is 117 lbs
• the average height is 5’7” (which as a side note, their BMI is one pound underweight according to weight watchers’ website)
• The average measurements were 34 (bust), 24 (waist), 34 (hips)… isn’t that the magic formula?
This is where I’m at now and my action plan:
• my hair is barely chin length, like I said in my previous blog, I used to shave my head. I haven’t cut my hair in almost a year but it seems to be a slow process. Action Plan: I will continue to grow my hair and consider extensions if by June I am not satisfied.
• my hair is dirty/ strawberry blonde. Action Plan: I don’t know, hair dye maybe? I think I’ll wait until it’s a little bit longer though as I don’t want to deal with touching up roots.
• I weigh 170ilbs. I am at the top of my BMI (according to weight watchers). Action plan: I am not willing to be an unhealthy weight. Call it lack of commitment but my health is more important. My target weight is 135ilbs. I will not do anything that will hurt me long term to achieve this. I will detail my diet/ exercise program below but I am not willing to take diet pills, be anorexic or bulimic, or start smoking to achieve this.
• I’m 5’9”. Action plan: I can’t change this. Get over it.
• I don’t know what my measurements are. I couldn’t find a measuring tape. I will purchase one and let you know in a later blog. Action plan: I’m not really sure how to mathematically figure out how to convert that ratio to my height. So for now, the plan is to have hips and bust be the same measurements and my waist to be significantly smaller in order to create the ever so sexy, hourglass figure.
It may sound like I’m being hard on myself but I’m not. I actually think I’m pretty attractive. I have a woman’s body with womanly curves. But here’s a picture of me. I’m not wearing makeup. I’ve worked all day. I had maybe 4 hours of sleep last night. I’ll let you be the judge.









The Diet and Exercise Routine!
I am using sparkpeople.com to give me suggestions and track what I eat and how I exercise. The daily goal is to consume between 1200 and 1500 calories and to burn 217 calories with cardio every other day. Likely I will exercise more than that. I should mention that I really love food. It is so delicious. Dieting is annoying but I will do it for the sake of the blog. I should also mention that I will be focusing on foods and exercises marketed specifically towards women. There will be reviews of this posted on my spark page blog. You can follow what I do at www.sparkpeople.com my user name is sexydevon. The first Monday of the month I will give an update on my efforts to diet and exercise. Hopefully the lack of cookies doesn’t make me kill anyone.

Anyways as contrast to askmen.com’s list, here’s my list of the top sexiest women I don’t know personally:
10. Cate Blanchet (actress)
9. Audrey Tautou (actess)
8. Amy Adams (actress)
7. Kate Winslet (actress)
6. Zoe Boekbinder (singer/ song-writer www.zoeboekbinder.com)
5. Katrina Dohl (Burleque/ pole dancer extraordinaire)
4. Natalie Portman (actress)
3. Michelle Minx (Burlesque/ pole dancer extraordinaire)
2. Kim Boekbrinder (singer/ song writer http://www.theimpossiblegirl.com/)
1. Amanda Fucking Palmer (singer/ song writer www.amandapalmer.net)

My list is full of rather curvaceous women. I think women who look like women are sexy. I don’t think that when you see someone and you have an overwhelming urge to hand them a sandwich is sexy.
Also I find that I am attracted to people’s personalities, or the personalities they project. Whether it’s their choice of roles, their music, their education, or the fact that they are a force of nature to be reckoned with, what they do increases their beauty. And I don’t think I stand alone in this train of thought. Megan Fox could easily fit into any hot tub on any beer commercial ever, but it seems that whenever she opens her mouth, stupidity comes out. I just can’t find someone like that sexy, no matter what their body looks like. I’m sorry Megan Fox. I’m sure you’re a lovely, intelligent woman. You just don’t project it to the rest of us very well.
Which brings me to next week. Next week I will be exploring what women do (how the act, what they know/ talk about, attitude) that makes them sexy.

Until next week!
Devon
http://twitter.com/littledevongirl

Skin Deep

I love Feminist theory. I bought five of Judith Butler's books after reading a paragraph she wrote. I've taken my Women's Studies 101. I love the Guerrilla Girls. I used to shave my head and not wear make up.

Anyways, one day I woke up and said FUCK IT. I want to be hot and sexy and have millions of boys (and some girls) hang posters of me on their walls. And then I thought, I should blog about it because everyone will want to hear about this transformation and I'm so interesting and narcissistic...

Well that's not totally accurate but I have decided to dedicate (as much as I can dedicate as a full time student and almost full time worker) 6 months of my life to transforming myself into the media constructed image of what a sexy heterosexual woman should look and act like.

Why, you maybe wondering, would you ever want to do that? Do you hate women? Are you trying to set feminism back 2 billion years? Are you really that desperate to get laid? No I don't hate women. No, I am not trying to set Feminism back 2 billion years, but I think it would be pretty complimentary if my little blog managed to do that. And no, I am not trying to do this to get laid, although that would definitely be a plus. The following is what made me decide to pursue this crazy and possibly sadistic project (in no particular order. Some are rather personal):

-New Years Resolution. On December 30th 2009, I decided I needed a new years resolution. So I googled 'what makes women happy'. The results were overwhelmingly to do with relationships and sex, specifically those of a heterosexual nature. Maybe gay women are already happy and don't need Google for advice? It made me start to think about how women are often portrayed in the media as not happy or complete if they are single. And that more frequently than not the way to being not single is only a make over away.

-Curiosity. I want to know if all that crap about girl power and taking control of my sexuality is true. I want to know if Lady Gaga running around in no pants, Britney and Miley pole dancing and, Katy Parry kissing girls and liking it makes them better more complete people than the pants wearing librarian with a stamp collection.

-Make Over Shows and Surgery. People spend a lot of time, energy, and money to make themselves look good. People also spend a lot of time watching people try to look good. Why?

- Megan Fox. There's no denying that women have long been an object of sexual desire in film, television, magazines, and adds. I would even go so far as to suggest that sexy women are the backbone of the selling anything in the Western World. Megan Fox's main purpose in Transformers was to be hot. This baffles me to no end.

-The need to rebel. The pop culture feminist point of view states that the over sexualized image of women renders them powerless. That it objectifies us. No one ever really questions this.

-The Internet. I am in awe and complete wonder if how much the Internet shrinks the world. Someone in Iceland could read this and message me about it with minimal effort. This intrigues me. Do people in Iceland ever think about this?

-Writing. I want to be paid for writing. I love to write. I "head write" all the time, very little of this ends up on paper or on screen. Even if no one ever reads this at least I'm writing in a place where people could potentially read it. This makes me happy.

-Control. I am currently taking anti-depressants. I think I have been depressed for a while but two rather traumatic (and unrelated) events last spring had set me in a downward spiral and in the end, I couldn't really function without them anymore. I am chemically unbalanced. That's okay. But if happiness lies in size four jeans, I'd like to know. And if it doesn't then at least I wont wonder anymore.

All of these reasons have lead me to the question:

Could personal fulfillment, happiness, and purpose actually be skin deep?

I will be posting Blogs every Monday so that if you so choose to, you can follow me on this journey of self discovery or stupidity.

Also if you would like to, you can listen to me screaming vapid nothingness into the void of the interwebz on twitter at http://twitter.com/littledevongirl

Next week, I will be looking at Askmen.com's top ten sexiest women of 2009. I will be looking for commonalities between the lovely ladies so that I have a place to start. I will also make a list of my top ten sexiest women and compare and contrast.

I predict that they will be very different lists.

Oh and in case you were wondering. I'm Devon. I'm (almost) 25 years old. I'm female. I live in BC. And now, I have a blog.